<<新主題 | 舊主題>>
娛樂滿紛 26FUN » 吹水版 » HR MEMO
返回列表 回復 發帖

HR MEMO

To all Employees:
1 V$ a8 T8 S5 d6 @- @! i3 |> >                     Effective January 2007' F4 C: Q* I- S; d: D% i
> >2 E. Y* z+ _- H+ R3 C
> > Dress Code
+ ~8 j" S* u; P0 }" \6 t$ b, ?* j; B> > 1. It is advised that you come to work dressed
" A# P3 ?# l( u  m" V5 I  I> > according to your salary. If we see you wearing
# D8 E3 R3 @3 E. u$ ~7 j> > Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we assume7 C% m" N. G( @3 ?* z2 b
> > you are doing well financially and therefore do not
4 g2 h) {& k; ]8 u7 A> > need a pay raise.5 n- U# s9 C$ Z, O. P7 L. o) t9 `
> > 2. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage7 A# U/ d8 f. r- p& _; y, q- b
> > your money better, so that you may buy nicer
% h9 G6 z0 T8 ~# ~> > clothes, and therefore you do not need a pay raise.
9 o+ N9 z+ I1 b8 M1 [4 H  l> > 3. If you dress just right, you are right where you
, G2 ~% |( S( n" F; B> > need to be and therefore you do not need a pay
! e' k' F1 y7 b0 |& r> > raise.5 E7 s+ u( t3 s. m( k4 Z! Q
> >0 h( I; z7 H/ I$ M6 r3 n/ d0 E4 q
> > Sick Days7 P2 @) c8 ~$ ~3 Z# N) o
> > We will no longer accept a doctor's certificate as
) h" d! h6 d" g" w* k$ \( k" ]> > proof of sickness.6 j( j# U& ?% d0 T; ^- ~3 M' f
> > If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able, F8 u: C9 ~" C  k# F1 g2 P, k
> > to come to work.
8 d4 A3 Y8 H& [! Z> >2 L- m7 E8 w: l
> > Holiday Days2 B7 M- p; Q/ W. R4 S" E. e0 `, K
> > Each employee will receive 104 personal days a
( u, ^; I. h: V# @> > year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
: T( W, }) V5 Z% [2 V8 d> >6 u! D: W* F% R: \! ^
> > Compassionate Leave3 p( D& W* u3 m, W0 V" T- m" G
> > This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing9 A9 }5 D5 q, [% X
> > you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-
6 E% X$ \2 I# J# {> > workers. Every effort should be made to have non-& n% S, u: H) C. I: M& Z" p
> > employees attend to the arrangements.
6 r. c2 V% o% c7 \( s> > In rare cases where employee involvement is& P3 R, g7 n/ a* k6 b+ ?
> > necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the" B) N" v% g1 \9 J& K
> > late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work
& j) X3 s4 ?7 S> > through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one
5 Q2 W; ?2 }2 w/ q> > hour early.1 R( |$ v% ]0 w$ J! J4 F5 s
> >: B4 i. K6 r8 p1 e$ P( W. P
> > Toilet Use
9 Y- i, i3 V# C- W$ I* J$ D/ O> > 1. Entirely too much time is being spent in the! ]6 f+ M: y+ N! Q& K
> > toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit: E- ]) Y5 x  p2 x; l  O
> > in the cubicles.
6 }4 B$ q2 g+ _! }  Z; d  r> > 2. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will
4 @6 I) R* v9 i+ m> > sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the cubicle
8 d0 f2 s" @4 x5 N$ f> > door will open, and your picture will be taken.! v5 g& }9 j' w
> > 3. After your second offence, your picture will be
* F' s3 V6 I% A# u8 B6 G> > posted on the company notice board under the" x4 w' m: q! ^, z" D% t
> > "Chronic Offenders" category.2 o. R- ?* {7 [4 I6 l
> > 4. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be; U7 l5 \0 {4 h# C1 V
> > sanctioned under the company's mental health
. ^' C9 o/ g0 W" ]! R> > policy.7 U+ U' o7 v$ c" Y' E  M8 y% p
> >5 I2 U+ s; y) o" b. R7 ?' r1 ]
> > Lunch Break( u# ~0 [! s9 r+ N
> > 1. Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they
1 L" g' ^# c8 M. U/ I  V- K! L# ~> > need to eat more so that they can look healthy.+ U" {& B: }7 a
> > 2. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to
9 K2 S3 S& ?, s$ U> > maintain their average figure.
; }$ h5 @+ y5 [% `9 d" Y> > 3. Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time
/ U0 y7 Z: [! {7 L6 Z$ Q> > needed to drink a Slim-Fast.4 H  E# H/ b# ?
> > Thank you for your loyalty to our company. Remember we are! @: f2 _/ `9 v) ?% H
> > an employer of choice and we are here to provide a positive
3 ]% N1 Y3 v8 M* L% V  S% ?> > employment experience.- L1 O% g, m$ t" C1 c
> > Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
" i; d2 Q2 ]$ \% U/ M> > frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations,' l9 k7 M2 z: p7 Q2 S7 G# v8 H8 }
> > accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be6 f8 b4 M5 K! h: k% [' m8 P
> > directed elsewhere.
返回列表 回復 發帖
<<新主題 | 舊主題>>
娛樂滿紛 26FUN » 吹水版 » HR MEMO

重要聲明:26fun.com為一個討論區服務網站。本網站是以即時上載留言的方式運作,26fun.com對所有留言的真實性、完整性及立場等,不負任何法律責任。而一切留言之言論只代表留言者個人意見,並非本網站之立場,用戶不應信賴內容,並應自行判斷內容之真實性。於有關情形下,用戶應尋求專業意見(如涉及醫療、法律或投資等問題)。 由於本討論區受到「即時上載留言」運作方式所規限,故不能完全監察所有留言,若讀者發現有留言出現問題,請聯絡我們。26fun.com有權刪除任何留言及拒絕任何人士上載留言,同時亦有不刪除留言的權利。切勿撰寫粗言穢語、誹謗、渲染色情暴力或人身攻擊的言論,敬請自律。本網站保留一切法律權利。