[English]: Jokes..

小强

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1) A recent survey asked 100 sexually active men what they most enjoyed about a blow job
+ O- O3 ^5 ~# N3 H99.9% of them said, the 10 minutes of silence
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9 {3 N2 K. B! d1 Q# J( J; n& ]0 j2) Advantages of having an affair with a married woman?0 r* c3 @' K: U' N3 n$ W5 e! D4 @9 Y5 |  n
a.They give like hell.
  `1 v0 M6 P. V7 Wb.They do not yell.
+ m3 U8 c' G( H) f: Vc.They do not tell.2 C( Z! ]! n3 c
d.They do not swell and there is no wedding bell.- }, j! w, T1 u) ]
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3) A woman once said that a man is like a deck of playing cards. You need:- m7 _( r6 T& {4 V( [& S
- a HEART to love him,4 B7 s1 ?9 q7 z( `) d
- a DIAMOND to marry him,
, j* w2 d$ K( l( z' n! a- a CLUB to smash his head in, and* `" T3 r$ v8 }  q9 z7 M
- a SPADE to bury him!
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# ]8 Z! b# n0 P# q1 B) V4) What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?1 V2 @( K. g) B3 U8 P" q
Both are sweet in the beginning and become tasteless and shapeless later
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+ _; O( U2 X0 P! Z" ]5) What is the strongest muscle?
  ?6 Z& L2 T% I- |- o1 TThe tongue. It can raise a woman’s hip with just one lick!
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6) Why is the 69 position like driving in rush hour?
* \  x* N/ e. b6 V" yThe arse hole is always in front of you.
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7) What is the difference between a panty & a stage curtain?
) J0 d  I9 `! h0 EWhen you pull down the stage curtain, the show is over.. but when you pull down the panties, it’s SHOWTIME!- g4 ]6 X: |8 C9 j
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8) A divorced man meets his ex-wife’s new husband at a party. Later after knocking back a few drinks, he goes over to the new guy and asks him: So... how do you like using second hand stuff?
. E# z3 g9 N. I9 P; ?% L4 D7 X# p1 z7 nThe new husband replied: It isn’t that bad. Past the first three inches, it’s all brand new.