[English]: Jokes..

小强

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1) A recent survey asked 100 sexually active men what they most enjoyed about a blow job
; v; I  V: R) m3 b( H) f99.9% of them said, the 10 minutes of silence4 }2 c# c; c0 f3 ^, u9 J

$ [  s+ z, O; O6 a8 ?2) Advantages of having an affair with a married woman?
4 y7 r5 s& G' s6 {2 U6 u( @a.They give like hell.
% A- A* J) b+ i7 n' w5 Mb.They do not yell.
. q$ ~! Q  P1 u/ D3 hc.They do not tell.
$ `) N  C' w, md.They do not swell and there is no wedding bell.- o6 d& y* N6 O9 d: Q: Z: L0 U/ [# w

% [) w& [% w, J. _' H% o! w3) A woman once said that a man is like a deck of playing cards. You need:
2 M4 ?& y( d2 P- a HEART to love him,! Q  i- k! ?, ^, G2 a
- a DIAMOND to marry him,; y! o& ~$ |: T# W% Z5 [4 ^
- a CLUB to smash his head in, and
- ^0 }% R; P0 ^/ G0 I% x- a SPADE to bury him!
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( p1 }' Q4 r& L+ P% _7 s4) What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?
7 R0 x/ J6 l( G, yBoth are sweet in the beginning and become tasteless and shapeless later
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5) What is the strongest muscle?5 D; I4 R' [. C# L4 [
The tongue. It can raise a woman’s hip with just one lick!
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6) Why is the 69 position like driving in rush hour?. ]2 ^2 S6 @- c) ~" w
The arse hole is always in front of you.
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: ^+ n& R, K0 E- _. A5 X9 A+ K3 U7) What is the difference between a panty & a stage curtain?
5 v3 r+ \" V% }$ j, q( @1 JWhen you pull down the stage curtain, the show is over.. but when you pull down the panties, it’s SHOWTIME!% H( y3 y0 D2 r7 u5 E' I

+ m, h* n% @( x/ m( w; ]# F6 |5 }9 K8) A divorced man meets his ex-wife’s new husband at a party. Later after knocking back a few drinks, he goes over to the new guy and asks him: So... how do you like using second hand stuff?
; L  @4 B/ h8 T& P  M) ^The new husband replied: It isn’t that bad. Past the first three inches, it’s all brand new.